How to Practice SAFE STRESS

Hi everyone!

Question, anybody feeling stressed these days? Lots of stress? Little stress? Well, I’m here to give you another way to look at stress. It’s called practice safe stress. It’s good for you. It’s good for me. It’s good for the planet. It’s good for everyone.

So, here’s how it goes: There are two extremes when it comes to being upset and angry and filled with stress and if you can picture stress like a pitcher, and you fill it with stress. Fill it, fill it, fill it, and it gets to the top, but you still have the anger, upset, annoyance. You still have this stress and you put one more drop and it spills over and that’s when it starts to get kind of murky and muddy and annoying to people, but here’s what I want you to look at, the two extremes. I call it ‘freakoutville’ and ‘zombieville.’

So, see which category you fit in, the ‘freakoutville’ people are those who are ‘drama queens and kings’ and believe me there are plenty of drama kings out there, as well as drama queens. There are. So, that’s part of ‘freakoutville’ is the drama. Another one is the ‘bully persecutor’. This person who points their finger and always blames you for everything and they can get really loud and annoying when they are upset. Another one is the ‘rebel’ and they’re always wanting to fight this system and they will not compromise and nothing will work until they really get hurt and looked at, and the fourth one is this: ‘superachiever,’ the me, me, me, guy or gal who has to be first, has to be heard, will push themselves to the front and center and say, ‘this is, this is me. I have all
the answers on the good one.’

So, those are the ones that live in ‘freakoutville’ and when stress gets high, you hear them they make a lot noise.

Full disclosure, I have to admit, I’ve had to work on the drama queen part of my personality. For a long time, the other side, the other extreme that’s ‘zombieville’ and in ‘zombie,’ they’ll live the ‘procrastinators’ who never can get anything done. They’re always saying, ‘tomorrow, tomorrow, I’m late, it’ll be in time,’ but they don’t want to be judged. So, they hold back and they get really quiet. So, ‘zombieville procrastinators.’ Another one is, the ‘avoider’ and they hate conflict and they’re the going to go, guy or gal, and man. They are out of there as fast as they can, be never to be seen again.

Another one is the ‘denier,’ who goes what problem will find a miracle cure for everything, will do everything. There is no problem . Problem: ‘Don’t tell me, because I can’t see it. I see things through rose-colored glasses,’ and the fourth one is, the ‘pleaser.’ ‘Pleaser’ who says yes to everything. They want to say ‘no,’ but they stuff it and very quietly they say, ‘sure, yes, fine, I’ll do it.’

So, what do you do with these two extremes? Well, you have to figure out first where do you fit in this. Are you in ‘freakoutville’ or you in ‘zombieville?’ We all fit into one of those categories, and the idea is to move into the center to the safe stress zone, where we can practice safe stress and these days are really fabulous.

Well, I don’t know if fabulous is the right word, but these days are really important days to practice staying centered, and I have some techniques that I’d like to give you, in terms of getting out of the pattern, that you used to use to move into that safe stress zone.

So, I’m just going to give you a couple and then I will be having a webinar that is going to be strictly on how to handle stress in the next few days, and I’ll let you know when that be. What I want you to know right now is, there a couple of basic things you can do, and one of them is, really kind of interesting. It’s a simple exercise.

Pay attention to it when you’re in that place, and you can feel the mat coming on. Do this, raise your shoulders to your ears and drop them and do it this way, when you raise them, you breathe in and when you drop them, you breathe out. So, it’s breathe in, breathe out and do it. I don’t know, six, eight, ten times and then stop, and ask yourself, ‘what do I want as an outcome of whatever you’re upset about. Be it at home, or at work.

In the community, there’s a lot of stuff that people are struggling with right now, and this is really a simple, simple way but use your body. Your body will be able to help you. So, that’s one of the things I’d like you to do.

Another one is, to really look. Look, see what the pattern is and begin to look. All these patterns are
transformable and that’s what I’m going to be talking about in the webinar.

So, I’m just going to give you one, because it’s got my name on it, that ‘drama queen.’ When I realized that I would like what I didn’t like to. I did create a lot of annoyance for people. When I was upset, I pound my hand on the table or I would make nasty comments to be heard. I wanted to be heard and I had to learn to transform that.

What did I transform into? I became a pretty good storyteller. Think of it this way, when you have drama, it raises the adrenaline and it actually feels good in the moment. Afterwards, you’ve got a lot of clean up to do, but in the moment, it feels good. And then, when I learn to be a storyteller, I can use the same adrenalin. I can tell good stories. I can get that kind of feverish rush of flavor to what I want to say, but it has a purpose.

So, we’re going to look at these extremes. Do you live in ‘freakoutville?’ Do you live in ‘zombieVille? We’re going to get you to the safe stress zone.

Thank you so much.Talk to you soon. Have as best a day as you possibly can and keep thinking about how we can all help each other and make this world a better place for all of us.

Thank you so much.

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Sylvia Lafair