How to Get Your Point Across at Work
Storytelling is one of the most effective ways to communicate ideas, influence perspectives, and inspire action. However, it can also offend or alienate your audience when not handled with care.
The secret to powerful storytelling lies in the balance between conveying your message and maintaining sensitivity.
Dear Dr. Sylvia,
Recently, a VP started our “Town Hall” by sharing a powerful personal story. She was a recovering alcoholic.
It was a startling way (at least to me) to begin discussing what she titled, “New Ways to Work Together.”
It was, in effect, a sales job about getting back to a five-day, in-office work week.
Honestly, how she started her speech left me in a void. I have not taken the time to think about being back in the office all week. Nor the travel time, gas, and traffic.
I have not grappled with getting a high schooler to pick my kids up from elementary school, get them snacks, and start the dinner preparation for me to finish when I come home bothered and tired.
Ultimately, all I can consider is that this very pristine woman who I admire used to go through two or three bottles of wine and champagne a day and finish off with some shots of tequilla.
I am at a loss.
I feel sorry for her and admire her at the same time.
She no longer drinks anything more potent than green tea, or so she said.
However, her story was the topic at work for days.
Only tell the part of the story that needs to be heard
Did she do this to get us all talking about alcohol or other addictions to steer us away from grumbling about giving up an ideal hybrid work environment?
I know you are a proponent of storytelling as a way to make the work setting more humane.
Yet, I, and many of my colleagues, are staying away from talking with her.
Why?
We are still trying to figure out what to say. Do we congratulate her on being free from alcohol? Do we ask her for a more detailed description of what it was like in rehab? Can we question her about how her husband and children are doing?
Mostly, I wonder if she started her speech as a way to derail the impact that a five day work week at the office would have on us.
I know you caution about the timing, the words, the emotion required when you use a personal story to put some pepper in a speech.
I would love your perspective.
Signed,
Storyteller in Training
“Careful the tale you tell; that is the spell” —Stephen Sondheim
Dear Storyteller in Training,
I bet you remember hearing me say, “telling the truth is NOT spilling your guts.”
This is at the core of using stories at work, using stories anywhere.
First of all, I would like to give you some basic ideas to consider when you are deciding on a personal story to tell at work.
Understand Your Audience
To tell a story that resonates, it’s crucial to understand who you are speaking to. Tailor your narrative in a way that aligns with their values, beliefs, and cultural sensitivities.
Awareness of potential triggers will help you craft a message that speaks to their hearts without stepping on toes.
For example, my story here is about taking a risk to speak out without causing negativitity and anger.
It is a story to heal not hurt.
Use Empathy as a Guiding Principle
Empathy is the foundation of non-offensive storytelling. When crafting your story, put yourself in the shoes of the listener or reader.
This helps identify what language, tone, or examples may seem dismissive or offensive. Your goal should be to connect emotionally while avoiding unnecessary conflict or misunderstanding.
In my story, I used empathic storytelling. By that, I mean telling a story without offending. When I talk about two tall men, I do not need to bring in race or other factors to make my point.
Focus on Universal Themes
Universal themes—such as overcoming adversity, self-discovery, and personal growth—transcend cultural and individual differences.
Tapping into these timeless narratives allows you to connect with a wide audience without risking offense.
These relatable themes invite the audience to reflect on their own experiences, creating an inclusive space for dialogue.
In today’s disconnected world, themes around arguing and fighting are common. I used an inclusive storytelling technique, looking for a way to create connection, rather cause more discord.
Be Mindful of Language
Language is powerful, and your chosen words can unite or divide. Avoid using jargon, slang, or any form of language that may come off as dismissive or condescending.
I decided to avoid the stereotype of expressing our most commonly used four-letter word, although the two tall men in my story did use it frequently.
For example, avoid stereotypes or generalizations. Instead, use inclusive language that invites people into the conversation rather than pushing them away.
Make Your Point Without Attacking
In storytelling, especially when addressing sensitive topics, it’s easy to slip into a confrontational tone. Instead of attacking opposing views, tell stories that highlight the strengths of your perspective.
Offer a new way of thinking without belittling other viewpoints. Present your ideas as options rather than absolutes.
I must share that I thought I was slightly deranged when I suggested the two angry men consider a new alternative. That is to say, I offered an option that seemed impossible when the words first came out of my mouth.
Offer a Resolution or Insight
A powerful story doesn’t just leave the audience hanging. I saw this as storytelling with a purpose.
After building tension, guide others toward a resolution or an insight they can take with them
This resolution should offer hope, learning, or transformation, leaving the audience feeling inspired rather than upset.
You will see that the ending, for me, was about crafting a transformational story. The transformation was inside me! It was what I learned from this brief encounter with two strangers.
Powerful storytelling is about more than just getting your point across.
In conclusion, it’s about sharing in a way that respects the audience, fosters connection, and avoids unnecessary offense. By understanding your audience, being mindful of language, and focusing on universal themes, you can craft stories that resonate deeply while still making your point.
To your success,
Sylvia Lafair
PS. You can learn more about the power of storytelling in my book “UNIQUE: How Story Sparks Diversity, Inclusion, and Engagement.“ Or give us a call at 570 233 1042.
