There’s a great game…
Whoops! All right, I got it all set now.
There’s a great game that you can play at Thanksgiving dinner. It’s called, “Connect the dots.†So, here’s how it works: Sit there and as you listen to people, think about who do they remind you of… there’s your uncle sitting there. Bragging about how wonderful he is, how great he is and you think to yourself, got that sounds just like my boss at work. He’s always telling us how wonderful he is and how he does everything better than anybody else, and then you look over, and there’s your sister who’s sitting there, sulking and whining and complaining that nobody ever pays attention to her, and boy you remember that, from all the years you were growing up, and how she was jealous of you, and you think about the woman at work, who sits in the desk next to yours is who’s always complaining and whining and saying everybody’s better than she is.
Well, I want you to begin to see that patterns that you learned in your original organization. The family show up in your present organization at work and the Thanksgiving dinner table sitting there. It’s very similar to being at a conference table at work, and once you get that connection, once you connect those dots, you are in a great position to grow and learn and be promoted, and be able to be more helpful to yourself and everybody else, and Thanksgiving is a perfect time for that, because you’re held captive for a certain number of hours. Even if everybody wants to run and watch football, you’re still sitting at the dinner table at one point, and it really is like the conference table.
So, pay attention and see your behavior in this. Connect your dots. Are you an avoider who likes to sit back and kind of just observe and not be part of it? Are you the super achiever who’s always saying, “Me, me, me? I’m the best improving it.†Are you the procrastinator who says,â€Oh, I’m so sorry, I meant to bring the pie or the stuffing or whatever and I feel terrible about it, but I just didn’t have the time,†which is always nonsense, but that’s what procrastinators do. Are you the rebel who no matter what somebody says, you always want to say something different and prove a point and start an argument?
Pay attention, because the patterns we learned in our original organization will always show up ’til we learn how to transform them. In my book, “Don’t Bring It to Workâ€, breaking the family patterns that limit success, I talked about the Thanksgiving being an incredible time to really learn about yourself. Relationships are probably the best teacher on the planet, and it’s time to grow and become even a better part of who you are. Kind of stand on your own shoulders, and Thanksgiving is a great time to do that.
So, let me know what the pattern is that showed up for you at work or the patterns of some of the other people there, and the other thing I’d like you to suggest to you, is to be able to ask questions, and I’m going to give you the words that really help open up a conversation. Say, “I’m curious or I wonder.†Those two words, I’m curious or I wonder, and then putting in the rest of the sentence makes a difference. People want to be heard they
want to be appreciated, and you’d be surprised how much it means to them to listen to you and begin to respond.
So, use Thanksgiving as a great time to grow and become the best you can be.
So, enjoy it, whether you’re eating turkey or tofu or our favorite, which is now cauliflower, anything and have a great time and enjoy the day.
Thank you for your time. Go for it.
