Patterns

Can’t Decide? Yes, No, Maybe? Here’s What To Do

By Sylvia Lafair | March 6, 2021 |

How to decide what to decide. Do you get all tangled up inside when you have to make a big decision? Or even a small one? For instance, “The tie comes in blue, red or leopard print. Which do I get?” Another example, “Is hotel A or B best for our summer vacation? Wait, what…

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Conflict Competence: The Answer to Your Stress

By Sylvia Lafair | February 25, 2021 |

Stressed out? Conflict competence is the solution. Read on to learn more… Dear Dr Sylvia,   I have a question and I need more than just an answer.  I need a solution.  I need an action plan.  If you can do that, I will follow you forever.  If not, I will delete you and look elsewhere.  Are you up for the…

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Why You Procrastinate (And 7 Ways to Stop)

By Sylvia Lafair | February 25, 2021 |

You may think there are a lot of reasons why you procrastinate, but it really comes down to one ugly underlying habit: people pleasing. Here’s how to stop. Dear Dr. Sylvia,  It took me weeks to finally press the “send” button on my email to you with my dilemma. This is embarrassing for me to admit out loud. Here’s…

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Stress & Mixed Messages: How to Stop the Maddening Communication from Messages that Are Inconsistent and Unclear

By Sylvia Lafair | December 19, 2020 |

Hi everybody! Sylvia Lafair here. Today, I’d like to talk about stress and mixed messages. When stress gets high, mixed messages get even higher, and I was thinking about when I was raising my daughters, and you know, I did mix messages. I’m sure most of you can relate to this one. I’d say, ‘Go…

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Look… We’re All Human, Right?

By Sylvia Lafair | December 2, 2020 |

Dear Dr. Sylvia, Look, we’re all human. Right? We all have good and bad personality traits. Right? We all change and grow as we become more seasoned leaders. Right? And in this uncertain and complex world, we all need to give each other some slack and help each other become the best we can be.…

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Why is My Boss Acting Like a Baby?

By Sylvia Lafair | November 11, 2020 |

Dear Dr. Sylvia, You remember the song from “My Fair Lady” that has the following words “Why can’t a woman be more like a man” and on and on it goes about male superiority. It really seems a bit old-fashioned these days when women are gaining strength at work, at home, everywhere. However, I think…

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Common Destructive Behavior Patterns That Can Drive You NUTS, at Work, at Home, Everywhere (and what to do about them)

By Sylvia Lafair | November 3, 2020 |

Dear Dr. Sylvia. I hate to complain, but my boss is driving me totally crazy. He is smart and knows the science behind what we do, however, as a leader he is just plain awful. For example, He is always telling us how great he is, how many awards he has won, about how much…

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Elections, Families and Victor Frankenstein

By Sylvia Lafair | October 21, 2020 |

Watching all the back and forth, division and blaming, fear, and concern about this election got me thinking.   Not long ago, on Twitter, someone posted “Whoever goes to the White House will bring along many others with their personal baggage.”  There was no claim as to who would win the election or who they would bring with them. Just a less than 280-character bit…

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I’m Not Pattern Blind

By Sylvia Lafair | September 30, 2020 |

Dear Dr. Sylvia, I’ve heard you talk about “Pattern Blindness” in the same sentence as “Speaking the Unspeakable.” Can you say more, please?  Here is my issue. I am beyond frustrated and stressed with my boss who is always saying the same things over and over. He loves to talk about himself and brag about…

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I Can’t Take Anymore Surprises…

By Sylvia Lafair | September 23, 2020 |

Dear Dr. Sylvia,Each day I think to myself “I can’t take any more surprises. I can’t take any more whining. I can’t take anymore bungled messes.” And then something else happens. I went into a deep depression after the news of Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s passing hit the world.Look, I didn’t know her, and my daily…

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