The Upside and Downside of Being a Mother

Summary: Being a mother is one of the most profound experiences a woman can have. It’s a journey with highs and lows, laughter and tears. Ultimately, it can be incredibly rewarding. Let’s look at the joys and challenges faced.

Dear Dr. Sylvia,

I am a working mom and I usually cringe with all the “sappy” stuff around mother’s day. Hallmark cards make we nauseous.

I want my mother and my kids to get a good look at this obviously important role many women have when it comes to being called “Mommy, Mom. Sometimes it’s THAT women I rarely talk with.”

And I loved what you wrote about being careful at work . It’s not to be a surrogate mother to a needy employee.

I think you have a creative and powerful way of looking at personal relationships. I appreciate how they play out at work.

Signed,

Working Mom

Dear Working Mom,

Thanks for the appreciation of my work.

It came from early years as a family therapist . I then took my knowledge of communications in close relationships into the workplace.

Everyone is connected in families, same in work: no one wins unless we all do.

This idea is not usual in our society. We think and act as individuals who do not have a powerful impact on others. Yet, we do!

Indeed, we are like that old prototype of “The Lone Ranger.” It no longer works.

In any case, here are some ideas you can “chew” on. Think of this as Mother’s Day rolls around for another year of flowers, candy, and brunch.

The upside of being a mother is well documented

Consider unconditional Love: From the moment you hold them in your arms, you can be overwhelmed by a love unlike any other.

Milestone Moments: Watching your child grow and achieve milestones. That goes from their first steps to their first words. This often fills you with an immense sense of pride and joy. These moments are priceless and create cherished memories that last a lifetime.

Bonding and Connection: Motherhood fosters an unparalleled bond between you and your child. The special connection you share grows stronger with each passing day. This forms the foundation of a lifelong relationship built on trust, love, and understanding.

Personal Growth: Motherhood challenges you to grow and evolve in ways you never imagined. It pushes you out of your comfort zone. Then you learn patience, resilience, and selflessness, and empowers you to become the best version of yourself.

Legacy and Impact: Being a mother allows you to leave a lasting legacy. It can make a positive impact on the world through the values, lessons, and love you impart to your children. It’s a powerful way to shape the future and contribute to a better world.

The downside of motherhood is talked about in hushed tones

Sleep Deprivation: Sleepless nights are a common challenge of motherhood, especially in the early years. The demands of caring for a newborn or dealing with nighttime wake-ups can leave you feeling exhausted and drained.

Sacrifices: Motherhood often requires making sacrifices. It may be putting your career on hold, giving up personal time, or setting aside your needs to prioritize your child’s needs. Balancing these sacrifices with self-care and personal fulfillment can be a constant struggle.

Guilt and Doubt: Mothers often grapple with feelings of guilt and self-doubt. It’s common to wonder if you’re doing enough or making the right decisions for their children. It’s easy to second-guess yourself and worry about whether you’re measuring up to unrealistic standards.

Lack of Me-Time: Finding time for yourself can be a rare luxury as a mother. Between juggling childcare, household responsibilities, and other obligations, carving out moments of self-care and relaxation can feel like an impossible feat.

Emotional Rollercoaster: Motherhood has highs and lows. Navigating the emotional rollercoaster can be overwhelming at times. From joy and pride to frustration and anxiety, emotions are constantly in flux as you navigate the challenges of parenthood.

Being a mother is a multifaceted journey with both upsides and downsides.

In conclusion, the joys of unconditional love, milestone moments, and personal growth make it incredibly rewarding. However, the challenges of sleep deprivation, sacrifices, and emotional struggles can be daunting.

Ultimately, motherhood is a unique and transformative experience. It shapes you in profound ways, leaving an indelible mark on your heart and soul. Embracing the ups and downs with grace and resilience is key to navigating this extraordinary journey called motherhood.

To your success,

Sylvia Lafair

PS. I dedicated my book “GUTSY:How Women Leaders Make Change“ to my mother. She grew up when women stayed at home, which she did. I was the daughter who said “There has to be more.” Writing GUTSY showed me how patterns we learned as children show up when we are adults.