Summary: As a leader, you’ve spent a lifetime navigating challenges, making tough decisions, and shaping organizations. But beyond business success, your true legacy lies in the lessons you leave behind. While profits and accolades may fade, the wisdom you pass down to your grandchildren will endure for generations.
Dear Dr. Sylvia (aka Grandmom),
I have a paper to write for my communications class at college.
Therefore, I am to interview one of my grandparents or an aunt or uncle who is on the ‘older” side.
Please know I do not see you as old; however, you are a grandparent, so you qualify!I want to choose you because you have had such an amazing career, and this would mean a lot to me.
Love you.
Arielle
Dear Arielle,
What an honor for you to choose me for your college essay.
Here are some ideas for when we talk, and I can tell you more about my growing years and the legacy from my grandparents to me to your mother to you.
Here is a more formal general perspective.
I can’t wait to talk.
I’ve spent my career studying leadership patterns, guiding individuals through transformation, and helping businesses thrive. Along the way, I’ve learned that leadership is less about power and more about presence. These lessons are the legacy I hope my own grandchildren—and emerging leaders everywhere—will carry forward.
Integrity is the Bedrock of Success
Firstly, trust and integrity are everything. Like love, they are hard to define yet vital to understand. I’ve worked with leaders who rose to the top with honesty and others who crumbled under deception. The choice is always yours: build with integrity or risk it all on shortcuts.
Early in my career, I was faced with a decision that tested my values. A major client offered a lucrative deal, but the terms required bending ethical boundaries. I walked away, choosing principle over profit.
It was a defining moment—not just for me but also for my reputation. Decades later, people still remember that choice, and it has opened more doors than any financial gain ever could.
Legacy Lesson: “Your word is your bond. Honor it, and you will always be respected.”
Resilience is Your Greatest Asset
Life will knock you down. What matters is how you get back up.
I remember working with a brilliant executive who built a thriving business—only to see it collapse overnight due to circumstances beyond her control. She had two choices: dwell in failure or find a new path. She chose the latter, reinventing herself and building something even greater.
The same applies to personal struggles. I’ve faced moments of loss, disappointment, and uncertainty, but each one taught me a valuable lesson: resilience is a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger you become.
Legacy Lesson: “Setbacks are inevitable. Growth is a choice.”
Curiosity Fuels Innovation
The best leaders never stop learning. I’ve worked with top executives and emerging entrepreneurs, and the most successful among them share one trait: insatiable curiosity.
When I was writing Invisible Stress, I didn’t stop at my own knowledge. I interviewed experts, studied new research, and explored perspectives outside my field. That curiosity led to insights that transformed not only my book but the way I coach leaders today.
For my grandchildren, I want them to know that curiosity is their superpower. Read widely, ask bold questions, and never assume you have all the answers.
Legacy Lesson: “Stay curious, and the world will always open new doors for you.”
People Matter More Than Profits
I’ve seen leaders rise and fall based on how they treat people. Success isn’t just about intelligence or hard work—it’s about relationships.
Years ago, I worked with a CEO who ran a highly profitable company with a toxic culture. Employees feared him, turnover was high, and the company was crumbling from within despite financial gains. He argued that”might makes right” and loved being the king at the top of the hill. He didn’t want to change, and it was one of the very few times I decided to resign.
In contrast, another leader I coached prioritized his team, invested in mentorship, and built a legacy of trust. His company not only survived economic downturns—it thrived.
To my grandchildren, I say this: Value people. Whether it’s your family, colleagues, or the person serving your morning coffee, treat everyone with kindness and respect.
Legacy Lesson: “You can always rebuild wealth, but relationships are priceless.”
Take Smart Risks
Playing it safe rarely leads to greatness. Some of the biggest breakthroughs in history happened because someone dared to take a risk.
I think about Albert Einstein and Alexander Fleming, scientists I write about in my new GLIMMERS book, due in 2025. They had those ‘glimmers’ of intuition and followed them, leading to discoveries that changed the world.
I’ve seen the same in leadership. Those who trust their instincts, take calculated risks and learn from failure often find themselves ahead of the curve.
Moving from family therapy to leadership development in the work world was a leap for me. I knew the impact it could have, but stepping into a new space always carries uncertainty. Yet, the biggest risk would have been not giving it a shot.
Legacy Lesson: “Take the leap—but always do your homework first.”
Give More Than You Take
True success isn’t measured by what you accumulate—it’s measured by what you contribute.
I’ve met leaders who spent their careers chasing financial success, only to find that wealth alone doesn’t bring fulfillment. On the other hand, those who mentor, give back, and lift others up find meaning that money can’t buy.
One of my most rewarding experiences has been mentoring young leaders, helping them navigate the challenges of business and life. Seeing them succeed has been far more fulfilling than any personal achievement.
Legacy Lesson: “The greatest investment you can make is in others.”
Hard Work and Focus Win the Race
There’s no shortcut to lasting success. The leaders I admire most didn’t get where they are by luck—they got there through discipline, consistency, and effort.
When writing Dont Bring It To Work, I reflected on the patterns we inherit from family that show up in our work. Many of these patterns revolve around sefl awareness—or the lack of it.
The way OUT is to Observe, Understand and Transform the patterns that no longer serve us. Those who learn to focus, commit, and work through discomfort are the ones who reach their potential.
To my grandchildren, I say: The world is full of distractions, but if you learn to focus and put in the work, you will stand out.
Legacy Lesson: “Talent is a gift, but discipline turns it into greatness.”
Your Legacy Begins Today
In conclusion, leadership isn’t just about what you do in your career—it’s about how you live your life. The lessons you pass down will shape the leaders of tomorrow.
In other words, to my grandchildren and all future leaders, I offer this: Live with integrity, stay resilient, remain curious, value relationships, take bold risks, give generously, and work hard.
These principles have shaped my life, and I hope they will shape yours, too. Because at the end of the day, our legacy isn’t just in the businesses we build, or the number of cars we collect—it’s in the lives we touch.
What lesson do you want to pass down? Start sharing your wisdom today.
To your success,
Sylvia Lafair
PS. My book Don’t Bring It To Work contains much more about legacy. You can find it on Amazon.
