Navigating Workplace Dilemmas: Unraveling the “He Said/She Said/They Said” Conundrum
Summary: Let’s explore the complexities of the “He Said/She Said/They Said” mismatched stories at work. I want to shed light on potential consequences and offer strategies to address and prevent such scenarios.
Dear Dr. Sylvia,
We had three excellent employees resign in the past month.
They all had the same frustration. There was a promise of promotion, title change, and higher salary after they “proved” their capabilities in their areas.
Time went by, and they asked for clarity. Yet, the issue was ignored.
Therefore, one at a time, they handed in their resignations.
After that, it got interesting.
The senior VP who managed all three said emphatically that there were never promises!
Consequently, he then began to “bad-mouth” them as inferior and not up to what the work entailed.
When conflicts arise, the tendency to gossip and play the “CYA” game becomes activated.
When they started in their positions, there was high praise. Yet, when they spoke up for themselves, their reputations went to hell in a handbasket!
I know you teach about patterns. I remember in “Don‘t Bring It to Work,” it says:
- If there is a one-time issue, handle it and get on with what is next.
2. If it happens a second time, see it as a problem that has roots in the organization and fix it.
3. When it happens three or more times, it is a pattern!
Then, it needs a close look at the whole system. Patterns demand a significant adjustment.
For now, can you offer suggestions on what needs to change quickly? I fear many blank spaces on the organizational chart.
I must add. No paper trail availalbe.
Signed,
Worried
Performance declines when there are conflicting narratives at work
Dear Worried,
Sadly, these conflicting narratives at work are all too familiar.
In every workplace, stories can unfold like intricate tapestries, weaving together the experiences and perspectives of various individuals.
However, when conflicting narratives emerge, especially without a paper trail, it can create a challenging situation for employees and employers.
Understand the challenge of conflicting stories. When there are employee disputes.
The “He Said/She Said/They Said” dilemma arises when two or more employees present conflicting accounts of a particular event, interaction, or project.
Without a documented record, it becomes challenging for management to ascertain the truth and take appropriate action. This lack of a paper trail complicates investigations and can lead to a toxic work environment, erode trust, and hinder productivity.
It is so easy to document promises made and then promises kept. Suppose there is no HR department. Each team leader and each employee must have a paper trail.
At the same time, I have observed that more women hesitate to ask for promises in writing. No matter how uncomfortable, do it anyway.
Establish clear communication channels at work.
Companies should establish clear communication channels to mitigate the risks of conflicting stories.
Most importantly, encouraging open dialogue between employees and providing avenues for anonymous reporting can help surface concerns before they escalate into full-blown disputes.
Thus, if the gossip starts, you can say clearly that you will not participate.
Implement documentation protocols to save lots of wasted time and money.
A robust paper trail is crucial for resolving conflicting narratives. Companies should implement documentation protocols that require employees to log significant interactions, decisions, and project updates. This provides clarity in case of disputes and serves as a valuable resource for performance evaluations and promotions.
Encourage mediation and conflict resolution training.
Investing in mediation and conflict resolution training can empower employees to address issues constructively. Mediation sessions can bring conflicting parties together to discuss their perspectives with the assistance of a neutral third party, fostering understanding and resolution.
Most of us grew up in situations where we learned to either “shout out” our responses to conflict or “stuff them down.”
Employee disputes are similar to when we blamed siblings, so we didn’t get into trouble. Pay attention to how you respond.
Leverage technology
Technology can be a powerful ally in managing workplace conflicts in the digital age. Implementing project management tools, communication platforms, and employee monitoring software can create a digital paper trail, capturing crucial interactions and reducing the likelihood of mismatched stories.
Institute periodic employee feedback surveys
Regular employee feedback surveys can help identify underlying issues and potential conflicts before they escalate. Creating a culture that values feedback and actively addresses concerns can create a more transparent and harmonious work environment.
The result of mismatched stories creates a culture that suffers.
If conflict is not handled, performance declines, partners become adversaries, poor decisions are made, and productivity declines.
In conclusion, navigating the “He Said/She Said They Said” mismatched stories at work requires a proactive approach from employees and employers. Companies can create a healthier workplace environment by prioritizing communication, implementing documentation protocols, and leveraging technology.
Addressing this challenge head-on fosters employee trust and contributes to a more productive and cohesive workforce.
To your success,
Sylvia Lafair
PS. Want more information? Please contact us for a short complimentary book, “Seven Ways to Successful Group Dynamics.”