Blogs
How to know if he or she is a denier
I recently received a curious email asking for help. Most of the time I get questions about work and leadership issues. This one is a bit different however it does fit into the patterns I’ve been discussing on the blog here.Dear Dr. Sylvia,You know that last week was Valentine’s Day. Well, you know, and I…
Transforming the martyr to the integrator
Imagine what it’s like to work from dawn till, no not dusk, till the middle of the night. Imagine if you do this while you have a background program in your head saying “Worry, the catastrophe is about to happen.†Even when there’s no big deal issue there are those whose first love is to…
Why being a clown just doesn’t work
Summary: When situations at work are tense, there is a need for some laughter. Timing is a core issue. Here are ways clowns at work (annoying) become humorists (clever). Dear Dr. Sylvia, When numbers are down, I need help getting my team out of a fear-based mentality. Most importantly, This is a tense time. Above…
How to become an elegant truth teller instead of a people pleaser
Summary: Do you worry that too many of your employees are people pleasers? They do whatever you say and never speak up or challenge you? Here are some ideas for you. When you or others fear speaking up it causes stagnation. That’s when creativity is nowhere to be found. For instance, you want your team…
How to harness the drama queen and turn it into story telling
One of the main behavior patterns that is showing up strong these days is the Drama King/Queen. So many people have emailed me, just this week, asking how to harness the excess noise that comes with drama people at work and home. And the most frustrated are those who see how social media can become…
Let’s vision 2018 as a year of hope
Here is my wish for you, for all of us, as we get ready to release the old and ring in the new. Would you say its been a roller coaster year? It’s hard to process all the political dramas, climate challenges with hurricanes and fires, terrorist attacks, sexual harassment allegations, along with the usual…
If you’re a rescuer, it’s time for a change
If you (or someone you know is) are a rescuer, it’s time for a change. STOP! Relax. Just chill. Don’t do anything. Take care of yourself and forget about helping others. Take a break from saving the world. If these words bring a big sigh coming all the way up from your gut you’re listening…
How to Transform the Victim into the Explorer
Have you noticed that the more persecutor/bullies lash out the more the victims of their nastiness go to hide under the bedcovers? I don’t often feel like a victim, however, I had an employee who was the bossiest witch always telling everyone in the office what to do, on her terms. One day I hung…
How to effectively say “No More” to the persecutor
Summary: Here’s how the Persecutor (aka bully) stays in charge until someone (as in you) or (as in me) says STOP. Firstly, a true story: Dina told me in our coaching session that she did not think of herself as pretty. A bit overweight and with, as she said, dull, wispy hair, she was always…
Know a procrastinator? Here’s how to move them in the right direction
Here is an email that I just received and want to respond immediately. As in, right now. It’s incredibly perfect for the pattern I want to discuss this week, the procrastinator. First, the email: Dear Sylvia, Thank you for contacting me. I apologize for the delay in getting back to you. I hope this gets…
Rebels Turned Community Builders
Let’s look at the difference between a rebel who fights for what is right and how that rebel can turn into a community builder, helping all of us move to new heights of thinking beyond just right and wrong. I specifically want to look at the women of today who are saying “no more!†It’s…
Diving deep in the World of the Super Achiever
Lately I’ve been getting lots of questions and frustrated comments about the BIG SHOTS of the world, the super achievers. Many want to know how to get these blowhards to “zip it†and others want to know how to become larger than life like these often very talented (yet often very insecure) individuals. So, here…
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