Summary: Leadership today isn’t just about titles, strategies, or skills. It’s about you, and you, and me. It’s about how we each bring our voices forward, no matter our role. Today is about the courage to speak out, ask questions, and yes, to listen. We are at an inflection point where we can either make a positive change or revert to outdated, ingrained patterns.
Dear Dr. Sylvia,
In your programs and books, you discuss the courage it takes for leaders to speak out and remain steady when threatened. I have become a cowardly leader! I’m not sure it’s safe to say much since it might lead to controversy. Thus, I smile a neutral smile, shrug my shoulders, and respond, “Whatever is meant to be will happen.”
Can you offer some words of wisdom to help me finally break free from my self-willed incubator?
Signed,
Letting Go of Fear
Cultivating Leadership Without Fear
Dear Letting Go of Fear,
Today, I’d like to take a different view of leadership. It’s about you, and you, and you, and me. It’s about how we bring our voices into the conversation and recognize that each of us has a vital role to play, regardless of our title, age, or circumstances.
Recently, I have been thinking about a trip my husband, Herb, and I took many years ago from Madrid to Bilbao, Spain. The business/vacation was a pure delight, with sun, food, and the rhythms of flamenco.
Until…one word. Auschwitz. What started as a carefree trip was halted when an ad on a Madrid bus stopped me in my tracks. That was it, just a single word. We followed the sign into the Auschwitz Exhibition, and there on the wall was George Santayana’s warning: “Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”
Most of us know the facts. But standing there, in the dim light, surrounded by artifacts and stories, it no longer felt like history. It felt like today. Refugees beaten at borders. Journalists branded as “the enemy.” Polarization splitting families, workplaces, and nations apart.
Several hours later, we left heavy with grief, until the final poster offered a plea for life from a nameless Holocaust survivor.
“I beg you, do something. Learn a dance step. Learn to laugh. Because it would be too senseless, after all, for so many to have died while you live doing nothing with your life.”
That evening we watched a brilliant flamenco show. Feet pounding, bodies whirling, the room alive with emotional fire. Tears streamed down my face. That was it; leadership at its most human. Fully alive, creative, and connected.
Leadership Reimagined
Leadership isn’t only about strategy, education, or talent. It’s about standing on the shoulders of the past, learning, not repeating. It’s about refusing to stay stuck in outdated patterns, whether in families, communities, or organizations. My pledge is this: I will continue to work to help people break through those ingrained behavioral patterns(opens in new tab) that hold us back so we can step into the future with courage, creativity, and compassion.
What about you?
What’s your dance step? Your song? Your raison d’être, your reason for being? Because if we are alive, we are called to do more than exist. We are called to lead in our own way. I’d love to hear your story.
Leadership today means refusing to stay stuck in outdated patterns. It means choosing to create, to stand on the shoulders of the past, rather than repeating it. Because leadership begins when each of us decides to do something that matters.
To your success,
Sylvia Lafair
P.S. My upcoming book GLIMMERS at Work: The Self-Aware Leader’s Advantage is out soon. Get a free copy of the introduction here! (opens in new tab)
