Patterns

Are You a Pleaser or Rescuer? Yes, They Are Different

By Sylvia Lafair | October 21, 2025 |

Summary: Most people who’ve worked with me know that I often trace workplace behavior back to family dynamics. It’s not about blame. It’s about awareness, recognizing how the lessons we learned at home subtly influence our leadership, communication, and relationships. Dear Dr. Sylvia, I always thought I was, like most women, a pleaser. I was…

Listen for the Glimmers: Go Past Burnout and Resentment by Offering Ways to Reconnect Head, Heart, and Gut

By Sylvia Lafair | October 12, 2025 |

Summary: Resentment and burnout are not simply emotional states; they are physiological signals that a person has been living in chronic misalignment. The brain spins with overanalysis (head), the heart closes off in self-protection (heart), and the gut tightens, warning that something feels “off” (gut). This disconnection often results from prolonged stress, people-pleasing, or purpose…

How GLIMMERS Illuminate The Leader’s Path to Success

By Sylvia Lafair | October 1, 2025 |

Summary: We live in a world full of noise, deadlines, and distractions that pull us away from ourselves. But glimmers are stubborn little messengers of hope. They sneak in anyway. For example, they arrive in a stranger’s smile, the smell of brownies baking in the oven, the sound of wind threading through trees. These signs…

Breaking Boundaries: The Leader’s Guide to Doing It Right

By Sylvia Lafair | September 30, 2025 |

Summary: Family, culture, and tradition: our loyalty to them shapes who we are. But sometimes it cages us. Leaders must know the difference. Most leaders don’t fail because of competition; they fail because of the boundaries they refuse to challenge. Breaking boundaries isn’t about chaos. It’s about progress with purpose. Dear Dr. Sylvia, I am…

A Different View of Leadership in Today’s Polarized World

By Sylvia Lafair | September 22, 2025 |

Summary: Leadership today isn’t just about titles, strategies, or skills. It’s about you, and you, and me. It’s about how we each bring our voices forward, no matter our role. Today is about the courage to speak out, ask questions, and yes, to listen. We are at an inflection point, where we can either make…

Conversation, Debate, or Dialogue? The Path That Truly Transforms

By Sylvia Lafair | September 15, 2025 |

Summary: It’s easy to confuse talking with connecting. But not all talking is created equal. There are three very different forms of verbal exchange: conversation, debate, and dialogue. And the one that can change the future, at work, at home, and in the community, is the one we practice the least: dialogue. Dear Dr. Sylvia,…

When Polarization Becomes the Norm: Here’s What to Do

By Sylvia Lafair | September 11, 2025 |

Summary: Let’s face it: these days it feels like the world is split into “us” and “them” about… well, everything: politics, workplace policies, parenting styles. Polarization has become the default setting. And when being “right” matters more than being in a relationship, the cost is steep: broken teams, broken families, broken trust. The question is:…

Narcissism in Leadership: Can It Be Transformed or Must We Endure It?

By Sylvia Lafair | September 9, 2025 |

Summary: The phrase, “That’s just the way they are,” has excused bad behavior for far too long. We often complain about parents or bosses who dominate every conversation, hijack good ideas, and somehow always seem to find the spotlight. But here’s the million-dollar leadership question: Do we have to live with egotistical relationships, or can…

What’s Missing in Today’s Workplace

By Sylvia Lafair | September 4, 2025 |

Summary: Leaders are increasingly focused on productivity hacks, hybrid work schedules, and the latest tech platforms. Yet underneath the noise, something essential has slipped through the cracks. Hint: No AI can fix what is missing. Dear Dr. Sylvia, There was an awkward moment at work recently. Before we settled down for our ELT, one of…

When “Good Enough” Is Not Good Enough at Work

By Sylvia Lafair | September 3, 2025 |

Summary: We’ve all been told at some point, “Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.” Fair advice when you’re agonizing over the right shade of blue for a website. Dangerous advice when “good enough” becomes the default for leadership excellence, team productivity, and innovation at work. Let’s look beyond “good enough” for productivity and…