From Glimmer to Glow: How the path to flow state transforms your life


Dear Dr. Sylvia,

I know this sounds delusional.

However, I want to change my career. I want to make the shift now.

Let me explain.

I am a lawyer and work in a prestigeous law firm. Hiwever, the dream to be a lawyer was my father’s desire for me.

I was such a “good child” that I felt I had to go to law school to make him happy.

Look, I’m not complaining, just giving you the facts.

Most importantly, I make an excellent living; fortunately, some of my stocks have also been very positive, paving the way for a change.

In addition, with enough resources and a family cheering me on to “do what you love,” I am ready to move into a brand-new career.

Hold on to the dream of “do what you love” for life success

For example, over the years, since I was a teen counselor at a camp for children with emotional challenges, I have had a GLIMMER about being a counselor for at-risk youngsters.

I am ready, yet I hesitate.

Please help me turn the GLIMMER, that initial moment of “yes, I caninto something more substantial.

Signed,

Glimmer Guy

How to go from GLIMMER to GLOW to FLOW state

Dear Glimmer Guy,

What luck that you are secure financially to move to your dream job.

It is not unusual to follow what a parent yearned to do and couldn’t. Then it gets handed to the next generation.

Often, parents and children share the same mindset. That means going into the family business is a proper fit. Or perhaps becoming an actor when mom or dad never had the opportunity set the stage for your career.

Above all, in this present world, more people are willing to clear the past to free the present.

Clear the past to free the present and find your personal dream job

That is when you are determined to fulfill the dreams of generations past. Yet, that may not be your desire. So, what do you think you could do?

GLIMMERS are always around and will sparkle when you day dream or night dream

And that’s when GLIMMERS keep “tapping you on the shoulder.

Let’s explore how that initial spark can lead to sustained brilliance, the science of flow state, its value in our lives, and some books illuminating this transformative process.

My definition of a GLIMMER is paying attention when the head (intellect), heart ( emotions), and gut (instinct) align to guide you to your deep dreams for your life calling.

In the same vein, when you take the time to listen and not do the “yabbit” song, you know, the “yes but” logical explanation that only speaks from your head, the glimmer becomes a constant glow.

What is Flow

Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi introduced the concept of flow in his seminal book, Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience. Flow state occurs when you are fully immersed in an activity, losing track of time, and feeling a profound sense of control and enjoyment. Your skills and the challenge at hand align perfectly, pushing you to perform at your peak.

This isn’t just a work thing—it can happen during art, sports, coding, or even deep conversation. Achieving flow isn’t luck; it’s a skill you can cultivate.


The Journey from Glimmer to Glow

Often, our flow states begin as “glimmers”—small moments of focus or inspiration. These glimmers are indicators of what could be possible with the right mindset and environment.

To turn these into a constant glow:

  1. Follow Your Interests: Flow is easier to achieve in activities you love or are deeply curious about.
  2. Create a Ritual: Design consistent routines that prepare your mind for deep work.
  3. Eliminate Distractions: Flow demands your undivided attention. Reduce digital interruptions and curate an inspiring workspace.
  4. Set Clear Goals: Know what you’re trying to achieve. A clear objective helps the mind focus.
  5. Challenge Yourself: Choose tasks slightly beyond your current skill level. This balance avoids boredom and anxiety.

Why Flow Matters

The benefits of being in a flow state extend far beyond the task at hand. Research links flow to increased creativity, faster learning, and even happiness. In a world buzzing with distractions, cultivating flow is like finding an oasis of clarity.

For example, my client, who is a lawyer, always wanted to be a physician. His family only agreed to help with tuition to law school because they felt it was a faster route to success and financial security.

When he finally found the way to “clear the past to free the present,” he also found his route to the medical profession.

All in all, he decided that instead of becoming a physicial, being a nurse would fill that empty spot in his life.

Ultimately, six years later, he is a nurse in a busy hospital. He said, “I am profoundly grateful for the assistance I received from my Total Leadership Connection sessions for letting that GLIMMER grow to a GLOW I could no longer ignore.”

Be like my client. Find an aspecgt of your GLIMMER that will work for you today.

You dont have to change your entire career. Maybe you can volunteer or take some online courses to help you keep the dream alive.

For instance, another client who has an organizing business to help people eliminate clutter lets her GLIMMER shine. She has always loved following the best advice regarding health and wellness.

She changed the direction of her company and now provides along with deep house cleaning ways to make sure there are healthy foods and beverages in each house. People love this new direction and she has mad her GLIMMER become a constant GLOW.

“In fact,” she told me, “I have more business than ever and am in a positive flow daily at work. I love it.”

Books to Help You Get in the Flow

As has been noted, my new book, “GLIMMERS: How Head, Heart, and Gut Illuminate the Leader’s Path,” will be available soon. In the meantime, here are some worthy books to consider:

  1. Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
    • This foundational book explains the science of flow, offering insights into how to create the conditions for it. It’s a must-read for understanding why certain activities engage us deeply.
  2. The Rise of Superman by Steven Kotler
    • Kotler explores how extreme athletes tap into flow states to achieve the seemingly impossible, and how the same principles can apply to everyday life.
  3. Deep Work by Cal Newport
    • Focused on the necessity of distraction-free concentration, Newport outlines strategies for cultivating focus in a noisy world.
  4. Grit by Angela Duckworth
    • While not exclusively about flow, Duckworth’s insights into perseverance and passion provide a strong foundation for sustained effort and eventual mastery.
  5. Stealing Fire by Steven Kotler and Jamie Wheal
    • This book expands on flow states in various contexts, from Silicon Valley to Navy SEALs, showing how peak performance can revolutionize industries and lives.

In brief, the glow of a sustained flow state isn’t just about better performance; it’s about living more meaningfully. Start by noticing your glimmers of focus and follow them. With intention and practice, these fleeting moments will grow into a constant glow that fuels your creativity, clarity, and happiness.


In conclusion, what glimmers are you following today? How will you nurture them into a glow that propels you into the flow state? Let us know in the comments!

To your success,

Sylvia Lafair

PS. Please consider my Stress Mastery online program, which will help you overcome your fear of following your GLIMMERS.

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