Summary: Self-doubt is like an infection that only has one cure. That means you must change your mindset, until you, through your own free will, can release the nagging thoughts and be both strong and capable of leading with clarity and passion.
Dear All,
Recently, I received many emails from women executives plagued with self-doubt.
I must add that this includes, for free, a non-stop inner critic telling them, “You fool, stop pretending. Business is never going to change.”
Does doubt keep you awake at night?
In other words, does that self-sabotaging voice get louder as the night becomes quieter?
Furthermore, do you know deep inside your destiny is for a more fulfilling work-life that never seems to happen?
Self-doubt shows up in the world as a fear of failure and an unwillingness to take risks.
Hence, too many women are giving up and leaving great opportunities at work because they are self-sabotaging.
Therefore, frustration and disappointment show up, and the results are to replay the old way: be passive and placating.
Firstly, the big question is, “How can you tame that damn voice?
Secondly, “What must I do to be fearless?”
The cost of being authentic is to be vulnerable.
In addition, “What is the cost of being authentic?”
To continue, here is my response to all the ambitious, determined, creative women just tired of waiting for the world to catch up with them.
These women are running out of patience, empty, and still stuck in a self-sabotaging cycle.
Most importantly, never give up!!!!
OK, I’ve been told: “That sounds good. However, it’s superficial and meaningless. If that’s all you can offer, you may as well stop right here.”
Wait a second. There is more.
We must look back before we can build for the future.
What has been lost, trampled on, ignored, or avoided in your “HERstory. “
Here is the exercise that has helped thousands of women begin the journey to be fearless, authentic, stand out, clear, and ready to take on the world.
From my book GUTSY: How Women Leaders Make Change (pages 9-13)
My client Kathy is typical of many modern women.
She is well-educated and knows how to be politically correct in today’s highly competitive business world.
In addition, she can be direct and precise, commanding attention most of the time.
Finally, she can lead a team to success and gain the respect of her direct reports.
Yet, a heavy steel door appears almost impossible to open. It is about pushing past a mindset that is generations old. One that still labels and demands females to be friendly, appropriate, and tame so they do not get a reputation as a bitch!
Giving up the pleaser pattern is critical for future success.
Accordingly, here is what Kathy did to see how deeply her mindset was set when she was still a little girl.
I had her buy three children’s books, books that are for and about little girls.
Now it’s your turn. Browse Google and find three books to help you figure out where you are stuck. Cinderella, Snow White, Nancy Drew, Eloise, Fancy Nancy, and Olivia. Find three and, like an anthropologist, read them to see how they helped you become socialized. Here are some hints: Did you read these as a kid?
Yes, what you read did impact you. Yes, it did.
Now, answer the following questions:
- Little girls should always ____________________
- Good little girls would never _________________
- You should never associate with girls who ________
- Girls who are popular because they _____________
- The perfect life includes _____________________
In conclusion, do you want to do a real deep dive into the role culture plays in your present mindset? Contact me, and one of our coaches will lead you through the change process. Then, you won’t feel trapped with outdated ideas.
AND men…..give the gift that will give back to you positively. Buy your favorite ladies a copy of GUTSY.
