Summary: Your team may look terrific when everything is going well. People collaborate. Meetings are cordial. Deadlines are met. Everyone talks about trust, transparency, and “being one team.” Then the pressure hits. A major client threatens to leave. Revenue falls short. AI changes someone’s role. Instead of doom and gloom, here is a better way to look at the situation.
Dear Dr. Sylvia,
Everyone I talk to right now is spelling out doom and gloom—about everything. Complaints typically start with the weather, then move right into the economy, stress at work, and stress at home.
It seems like our entire culture is bonded through fear, polarization, and, as you say, JUBLA (Judgement, Blame, and Attack). I know we have to start looking at our own behavior patterns, but I need some ideas on what to do when I, and my team, feel extreme pressure.
Signed,
Curious
Watch How The Team Communicates
Dear Curious,
Let’s take a deep dive into group communication, then we can see how ingrained patterns show up and keep us stuck. Under pressure, we rarely become our best business selves. Instead, we tend to reach for behavior that is older, more familiar, and far more automatic. Does this sound like you or someone you know?
For example, Super-Achievers take over the situation. Pleasers say ‘yes’ when they mean ‘no.’ Avoiders disappear. Rescuers rush in to fix everything. Persecutors start blaming. Splitters quietly create sides by dividing the group.
These aren’t simply “difficult personalities.” They are patterns.(opens in new tab) And patterns become especially powerful when stress enters the room.
Pressure Doesn’t Create the Pattern, It Reveals It
That’s why I believe one of the most important questions a leader can ask today is not, “How well does my team work together?” It is, “What happens to us when we’re under pressure?” Because that’s where leadership gets interesting.
With AI accelerating, economic uncertainty continuing, and employees being asked to adapt faster than ever, teams need more than just another communication workshop. They need pattern awareness.
Pattern awareness is the ability to recognize what’s happening while it’s happening, and that’s where the GLIMMERS Effect™ happens.
The Five-Part Shift
It starts with a Trigger: A criticism. A missed target. An unexpected email. A colleague challenges your idea.
Then comes the Pattern: Defend. Control. Please. Avoid. Blame. Rescue. Overwork.
And then a powerful moment, the Pause: Instead of immediately reacting, you create enough space to notice what is happening.
Next comes what I call the Ugly Middle: The uncomfortable place where you know the old response isn’t helping, but the new response doesn’t feel natural yet.
Once you can move past this point, you then make a Choice: Where the GLIMMER appears, and awareness becomes possible. You didn’t automatically repeat. You chose. And when you choose, you find freedom from old habits and patterns.
Leaders Show Their Level of Self-Awareness When Under Pressure
The strongest teams of the future won’t be teams that never get triggered. They’ll be the teams that know what to do when they are triggered. So here’s the question I would put on the table at your next leadership meeting: What happens to us under pressure?
Don’t rush to answer it. Watch the body language in the room. Listen to the tone of voices. Notice what you, as the leader, can do to facilitate positive responses rather than knee-jerk reactions.
Your team’s next GLIMMER may already be there, and that’s how you spark awareness, inspire teams, and ignite culture.
To your success,
Sylvia Lafair
P.S. Ready to help your team communicate more effectively? Connect with one of our leadership coaches(opens in new tab) for a complimentary session to uncover hidden patterns and find practical solutions for lasting change.
