Summary: Charisma is cheap. Plenty of people can sound confident in a meeting, sell a vision, or dominate a room with “executive presence.” Coherence is rare. Coherence is the ability to stay aligned when the pressure is on, the feedback is sharp, and your nervous system wants to do what it’s always done: fight, flee, freeze, or people-please. That’s what separates leaders who build trust from leaders who build fear. Taylor Swift is a surprising case study in this. Not because she’s famous, but because she’s navigated relentless scrutiny, reinvention, and high-stakes business decisions in public, without being yanked around by every opinion, trend, or critic. Most executives say they want that level of self-direction. Fewer train for it. This blog is about the leadership operating system underneath that kind of steadiness: GLIMMERS, the subtle signals from head, heart, and gut, and behavioral patterns, the old roles we learned early in life that quietly run the show at work when stress spikes. If you’re an executive or entrepreneur, this isn’t “soft stuff.” It’s the difference between reacting fast and leading well.
Dear Dr. Sylvia,
I recently watched the six-episode Taylor Swift series “The End of an Era.” It provided a behind-the-scenes look at her record-breaking tour and how she worked with her team to make it a monumental success.
I was most impressed by her relatability, especially when she explained that, as a leader, she must align her internal beliefs with how she responds to her team and fans with confidence.
How does this connect with your work on whole-person leadership, coherence, behavior patterns, and your GLIMMERS philosophy?
I want some profound ways to grow into the next level of myself this year. This is not about being a SWIFTY, it’s about what I can learn from her success.
Thanks for any help you can offer.
Signed,
GLIMMER Learner
Why Taylor Swift Belongs in a Leadership Conversation
Dear GLIMMER Learner,
Let’s be clear: you don’t have to be a fan of Taylor Swift to learn from her.
From a business lens, she’s a brand builder, an IP strategist, a long-game operator, and a leader who stays remarkably self-directed in a world that profits from pulling people off-center.
That last part matters most.
Executives and entrepreneurs are living in their own version of “public scrutiny” every day: investors asking for certainty you don’t have, teams wanting stability while the market shifts, customers changing expectations overnight, competitors nipping at your heels, and the internal pressure to look confident (even when your stomach is doing somersaults).
Leadership isn’t just what you do. In fact, leadership is what you do under stress.
GLIMMERS are not mystical. They’re practical. They show up as:
- Tightening in your gut during a pitch that looks “perfect” on paper
- Heaviness in your chest when you’re about to betray your values
- A calm internal “yes” when the decision is right (even if it’s hard)
- Waves of unease around a charismatic hire you can’t fully explain
Under stress, your nervous system defaults to what it learned early.
That’s why your original organization, the family, shows up at work.
When Pressure Rises, Most Leaders Don’t Suddenly Become Wise Sages. They Become Predictable.
Stress responses typically fall into the following categories:
Fight: control, criticize, and attack.
Flight: avoid, distract, stay “too busy.”
Freeze: stall, procrastinate, numb out.
Fawn: people-please, over-function, rescue.
In leadership language, those stress responses often become behavioral patterns like:
The Super-Achiever: “If I perform perfectly, I’m safe.”
The Pleaser: “If everyone approves, I won’t be rejected.”
The Avoider: “If I don’t engage, I can’t be blamed.”
The Persecutor/Bully: “If I dominate, I won’t be vulnerable.”
The Rescuer: “If I fix it all, I’ll be needed.”
The Splitter: “If I divide and conquer, I stay in control.”
These patterns can appear to be “strong leadership” in the short term.
They also quietly create fear-based cultures, low accountability, high turnover, and teams that stop telling the truth.
In “The End of an Era,” Taylor discusses how she will remain strong and composed during the tour in London. This is after several shows in Vienna had to be canceled due to terrorist threats. Think about the responsibility, like the pilot of a full plane navigating through turbulent weather.
Here, she offers a great example of congruence when her head, heart, and gut must be aligned for the betterment of herself and all fans at a sold-out concert.
Below is my synopsis of how she talked to herself before going on stage.
Three Leadership Lessons Taylor Swift Models Through GLIMMERS + Patterns
1) She plays the long game instead of chasing short-term approval
Executives and entrepreneurs face constant pressure to deliver quick wins: quarterly numbers, optics, investor confidence, and nonstop comparisons.
That pressure tempts leaders into anxious decisions: overpromising, moving too fast, saying yes when the gut says no, or appeasing the loudest person in the room.
Swift’s career reflects strategic patience; she doesn’t let every opinion steer the wheel.
Leadership takeaway: If your decisions are driven by “What will they think?” you’re not leading, you’re performing.
GLIMMERS question: Where am I trading long-term trust for short-term relief?
2) She owns her narrative instead of negotiating for permission
In business, if you don’t define your story, someone else will: competitors, critics, internal gossip loops, or the “culture” that forms when leadership stays vague.
Swift doesn’t spend her life begging to be understood. She clarifies, creates, and moves forward.
That’s the difference between a pattern-driven leader and a pattern-aware leader: Pattern-driven leaders defend, explain, and chase validation. Pattern-aware leaders clarify, decide, and calmly repeat the message.
GLIMMERS question:
Where am I over-explaining because I’m anxious, rather than being clear because I’m aligned?
3) She handles pressure without losing presence
Presence isn’t a performance. It’s a regulated nervous system.
When you’re dysregulated, you misread tone and intent, react to feedback as if it’s an attack, punish truth-tellers, and make decisions to reduce anxiety, not increase effectiveness.
Swift operates under relentless pressure and still appears able to reset and keep going. That’s not luck. That’s regulation, boundaries, and coherence.
GLIMMERS question:
When stress spikes, do I become more myself, or do I become my pattern?
The GLIMMERS Method for Executive Decision-Making
Here’s a boardroom-friendly version you can use in 60 seconds.
The 60-Second GLIMMERS Reset: Pause → Scan → Name → Choose
- Pause: three slow breaths (yes, really)
- Scan: what’s happening in head, heart, gut?
- Name: which pattern is trying to take over?
- Choose: what would aligned leadership do next?
Real-world examples:
- Your gut tightens during a pitch → ask one more question instead of nodding along.
- Your chest races before giving feedback → slow down, get specific, stay kind and firm.
- Your mind gets rigid and judgmental, you’re in fight mode → regulate before you “lead.”
This practice doesn’t make you slower.
It makes you cleaner, clearer, and far less expensive.
The Real Executive Question: Are You Outsourcing Your Authority?
Many leaders outsource authority to the loudest voice, the fear of being disliked, the pressure to look certain, data without context, or “the way we’ve always done it.”
But whole-person leadership requires something different:
The ability to stay aligned when you’re being watched.
That’s the leadership edge Swift models: kind without shrinking, powerful without cruelty, visible without begging for approval.
A Quick Reflection for Executives and Entrepreneurs
Use these questions this week:
- What glimmer have I been ignoring because it’s inconvenient?
- Where am I defaulting to a familiar pattern under pressure?
- What would shift if I stopped performing and started leading?
And the blunt one:
If I weren’t trying to be liked, what decision would I make today?
Because culture doesn’t change through slogans.
Culture changes when a leader stops reacting and starts responding.
That’s what GLIMMERS are for.
To your success,
Sylvia Lafair
P.S. Want more information about how to lead from the inside out? First, take the STRESS Mastery quiz and then do the STRESS MASTERY online program.
